Page 670 in The Baratie
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Average Rating: 5
Number of people who have voted: 4

By the same author as Grand Line 3.5



5th Mar 2015, 11:09 PM

Now comes the good part! Tell a story about an enemy that just wouldn't stay down!

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5th Mar 2015, 11:54 PM

Kill Team in a nutshell.

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6th Mar 2015, 12:09 AM

I played a Mage game a decade a go that had a cyborg Technocrat bust into a friendly NPCs apartment and kidnap the plot-magnet-NPC's sister right in front of us. Since I was standing next to her when he tried grabbing her, my character pulled out a gun a emptied a clip into his face. No effect. Once we confronted the Technocrat at some junked power station, it devolved into a battle between the Cyborg and the plot-magnet-NPC (who was a Nova, from Aberrant). I didn't bother attacking since I didn't have a better gun and I took to much paradox/damage from the magical drugs my character took to get to that point wearing off. In fact, a huge mess of npc vampires appeared to help us out, and they were unable to help out as well. It took a Man-In-White to appear and tell the Technocrat to calm down and go back to observation work to resolve that situation. Always a strange sight to see the GM argue and fight with their self.

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6th Mar 2015, 12:18 AM

let me tell you about a prick named Dr. Xavier Black. This guy wasn't just a mad scientist, but he was a mad scientist with a holier than thou attitude, a seemingly unlimited budget, and fecking plot armor. EVERY TIME we took him down, he either teleported on his own or the Godmode Sue, Hitaki, snatched him away. No matter how many times he should have, this prick would not die. He survived a triple crit combo attack. He survived burning down a goddamn building on top of him! He survived having at least three of his mechs destroyed while he was in them! And to top it off, the GM drew out his last fight. Something about making it satisfying. I should have killed him with a neck snap once I pried him out of yet another goddamn mech, but noooo, the GM wanted to go for a longer fight. At that point I just wanted the bastard to fucking die so I hit him with my biggest gun: The BFG 9000. Yes. That one. Needless to say, THAT finally ended the prick. Still think he should have died quickly in a curb stomp battle though. THAT would have been satisfying.

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6th Mar 2015, 2:04 AM

I have two stories for this, neither of which fit the bill entirely, but both of which are pretty good.

First one was me as DM, for the first campaign I ever ran from that side of the screen. The first real quest the players embarked on was to save a kidnapped village girl from being sacrificed by a mad wizard. Secret lair in the mountains held up by his power- not much of a dungeon, as the journey TO the lair, and then finding it and the hidden secret room was enough of an adventure for a level 1 party. They clobbered his two bodyguard skeletons, and managed to kill him- or rather, they thought as much. By the math, they actually knocked him to -9 hit points, and when I rolled it on his turn, he actually stabilized there. His magic stopped working, however and the place began to collapse, so they grabbed the girl and fled before they could find out. It was an odd bit where what I had planned as a one-off villain ended up surviving the encounter with the party completely unaware- perfect for me to bring him back later as a twist.

Unfortunately, the game fell through before I ever got the chance to bring him back.

The second story is one from me as a player, and my Dwarf Knight that just would not die. In one of the fist encounters he faced- we were level 10 or so, my old character having been written out of the story- we were up against a sand dragon of sorts. In one of the later rounds of the combat, it rolled a incredibly high to hit, landing a devastating attack on me for over 130 damage. The DM described the event as the creature swallowing my character whole in one fell swoop. I asked the DM what the dragon had rolled, and when he informed me of its roll, I corrected him on that the attack actually missed my AC- which was a good 10-20 points higher than the next best AC in the party, conditions depending. So the dragon ended up nearly choking on my armour, and spat me back up. Which was good, because it saved me also having to explain that I had more than 130 hit points and would have survived the attack anyways.

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6th Mar 2015, 12:14 PM

The first one is a nice story, but I kinda doubt that having his lair collapse on top of him would fail to deal a single point of damage.

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6th Mar 2015, 12:14 PM

The first one is a nice story, but I kinda doubt that having his lair collapse on top of him would fail to deal a single point of damage.

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6th Mar 2015, 9:24 PM

I have a character like that, mostly for a single part of the current story arc of the Pony Tales campaign I'm running. He's called Benkei the Sun Dog (a Diamond Dog who joined a dragon-hunting crusade) which puts him at odds with the party, who are trying to navigate some caverns in the hopes of finding the dragon living in them.

The thing is, he's basically Gilgamesh from the Final Fantasy franchise. He's a RIDICULOUS ham, and while he is rather tough, he also has a habit of getting defeated by the environment. The first time they faced him, it was on a bridge spanning a river down below, so one of the party members finished the fight by kicking him over the side.

A while later he showed up again, somewhat soggier but otherwise no worse for wear. The party was in the middle of crossing a treacherous chasm when he appeared, and he was about to chase after them, except he slipped on a patch of ice one of the party members had left behind, sending him plummeting to the bottom again.

He showed up again soon after THAT, but this time it was the result of hallucinogenic mushroom spores, and as a result he soon turned into this:

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7th Mar 2015, 12:19 AM

A Sith Lord, with his mental stats pumped up as high as they could possibly go. He took a talent which let him become a Force Ghost when he died. So the party killed him, and then he came back and possessed their tank. Killed the party face. After he was killed again and trying to possess the DPS, the party finally destroyed his lightsaber, which was is tether to the mortal world.

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Roscoe Wrongrighter

7th Mar 2015, 3:36 PM
"Oh, this was a bad time..."

Okay, so it was a 3.5 single-session adventure a friend whipped out because we were all bored one summer afternoon back in 2010. My go-to class is Monk, so I rolled up a lvl 5 LG human Monk called "Stormin'" Norman Gruemoor. The other PCs were a human ranger spec'd for archery, an evoker mage, and a cleric, all lvl 5 and some variant of Good alignment. The plot was simple: there's a tower out in the woods with an orc encampment around it. Orcs are bad. Fight orcs for great justice. We snuck onto the 2nd floor of the 5-floor tower (since fighting our way through a ton of 1 HP orcs around the main entrance would have been tedious and stupid) thanks to Norman's Climb skill and an open window, then set up a rope to haul our heavy armor-clad cleric and Climb-inept mage up after. We snuck to the top floor, taking out some 1 HP orcs on the way, and find the BBEG: an orc commander in spiked heavy plate with a big honkin' kite shield and, IIRC, a spiked mace.

Now, I'd spec'd Norman as a hit-and-runner at character creation; very mobile, Unarmed Strike as my main damage-dealing method, and a houserule'd feat selection to allow for 5 attacks at no penalty when I used Flurry of Blows, even though a lvl 5 Monk should only get 2 hits in his FoB. Our DM let us houserule a lot of stuff so we couldn't complain when his BBEGs were waaay higher level than us; case in point, the orc commander was lvl 9 or 10.

So our mage hits him with a couple magic missles before blowing her spell wad and having to hang back. Ranger used a pretty good Skirmish to take a nice chunk of BBEG's HP away, but then it was all on Norman to hold his attention and actually take him down. I had 18 DEX and used Spring Attack a lot to keep from getting annihilated, but his shield gave him a crazy-high AC, and I simply could NOT hit him. I like to play my Monks like Luke plays Luffy: run up and PUNCH THEM IN THE FAAAAAACE. But this jerk wasn't playing along, and our ranger's arrows weren't doing much better since he was hanging back to protect the mage in case BBEG stopped trying to crush Norman into paste. Cleric tanked a few hits for me and spent most of her spells healing me when I got a couple bad rolls, but it was a battle of attrition we couldn't win the way we were going.

Eventually, I did like Luke and decided to grapple the jerk into dropping his shield so Ranger could get another Skirmish off. I had to eat some damage from his armor spikes, but I got his shield out of the way so Ranger and Cleric could wail on him and win the fight. Considering we REALLY shouldn't have been able to win, I look back and feel we did alright... but to this day, I hate it when enemies whip out a big honkin' shield to hide behind. It's enough to make me try my hand at a rogue or mage for the first time in the next game I join.

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9th Apr 2015, 1:54 PM
"Fate Points"

Running a DeathWatch mission with my Exorcist DeathWatch Champion and a Blood Raven Librarian, we encountered a Bloodthirster in the middle of a Chaos army in the Jericho Reach.

We dropped him, he burned a Fate Point and popped back up. We dropped him again, he did it again. We wound up having to kill him four or five times before it finally took.

Fortunately between our Pysker and my Exorcist anti-Daemonic specialties and Daemonhammer we were nicely equipped for him, but man did it take a long time to finish him off for good (ish; being a Daemon he was just banished for a century and a day or something).

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6th Mar 2015, 1:14 AM

Delurking just to say that this comic made me go back to reread the end of the Pearl fight, and I was very impressed when I (after going back and back and back big hunks at a time through the drop-down menu) realized how long ago that was. There aren't many webcomics that could keep a fight going on without it feeling draggy, but I haven't felt that way at all; it's been such a fun ride that I was amazed it's been going on so long.

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6th Mar 2015, 2:27 AM

We did have a flashback storry in the midle of it aswell, draging it out abit...

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6th Mar 2015, 2:05 PM

Let me tell you about our boss that just wouldn't die --

Now, let me precede this comment by saying our DM loves necromancy, and is very good at using it. That said....

4th level, and we're making our way through some sewers. Due to some genre mashup, we run into a homebrew water-bending class which is rather overpowered (as in can take several actions per turn to heal, blast, or put up giant walls of ice with hundreds of HP), but is "balanced" due to the fact that the power is granted by a "devil fruit", and thus both drowns in water and is unique in the world. Okay, sure. It is a very difficult fight, but with some last minute arrival/help from our NPC cohort, we manage to drive her off.

Cue about 5 more encounters with the same creature, only each time more threatening. We fought her as a --

6th level waterbender (defeated with cohort help)
10th level waterbender (defeated and fled)
10th level VAMPIRE waterbender (defeated, mistformed, and fled)
14th level VAMPIRE LORD waterbender (This was at level 12. It is worth noting we did not have a cleric).

This last time, a CUSTOM SPELL was researched that would lock her in a flask for a day once she entered her mistform, and even then it was an incredibly difficult fight. We eventually pulled through with some creative usage of Summon Nature's Ally to summon whales in the underground pools from which she was pulling her water, flooding the underground complex.

At this point, you'd think she was totally done for. So did we, seeing as we had gone to the trouble of researching a spell SPECIFICALLY to keep her down, and she wasnt even a plot central NPC. How wrong we were...

Due to plot, we used a ritual to consume her essence to power a spell that would destroy the BBEG, only to have it reflected and us teleported to his tower where ressurection was impossible. Seeing as she had no coffin (and as such would die in less than an hour), we figured there was 0 way she couldve survived and were happy. About 5 levels into the tower, we run into her again.

14th level Sanguine WRAITH VAMPIRE LORD waterbender. This was a custom template that basically made her incorporeal as well as gave her AOE telekinesis attacks/grapples as well as other moves. Well, we weren't going to stand for this and poured all of our efforts into killing her, putting together all our NPC allies and spells to the task. Eventually we manage to otto's irresistible dance her. 4 rounds to utterly destroy her. Great....except the DM chooses that moment to bring out another recurring villain. Who has custom abilities to absorb other people's abilities (If you've played fire emblem, picture the Black Knight. Yes, including the invulnerable armor. Yes, that is our DM.)

And so now....we still have to fight all the same overpoweredness...but with more abilities! ....Sometimes I hate my DM...

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6th Mar 2015, 5:16 PM

Yay! Story time!

When I was still fairly new to GMing, I picked up Pokemon Tabletop Adventures and suggested it to my friends as a joke. Turns out they were interested, so I developed a great big campaign, and let them make characters. One of these players made a Martial Artist who eventually classed into Ninja, and then into Black Belt when he'd maxed out his evasion. Between his evasion, the ridiculous health bonuses and damage reduction provided by Black Belt, and my lack of knowledge on how to run a campaign, he ran around pretty much freely without any way of stopping him. I only challenged him once- he went off on his own, and rescued a Plusle and Minun pair, but they were so startled that they released a pair of Thunder Waves, paralyzing him just as the Granbull that had been chasing him caught up. Between Bite and Headbutt, I was able to deny him enough actions to bring him 3 HP from KO, and I never got that close again.

Thankfully, I have learned my lesson since then, and have been much more challenging in campaigns we've played since.

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8th Mar 2015, 5:53 AM

Strictly speaking, I already did, though it was ages ago. Freaking cyborg assassin. Though I maintain Round 2 was an ass-pull by the GM, because he wasn't expecting any of us to actually kill our opponents and he needed someone to fight my character in the second half of the game.
As if putting the squishy empath alone in an enclosed, pitch-black space with the insane serial killer made of knives wasn't cruel the first time around. (For the serial killer, as it turned out. heh.)

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8th Mar 2015, 4:05 PM
"Chapter master"

This is a story from the game Mutant:Heirs of the Apocalypse a Swedish RPG set in the far future when man has stepped out of the protective bunkers after a devastating nuclear war.

We had been playing once a week for the better part of a year and my character had gotten unplayable, so I rolled up a new one.

Our DM said that we were approaching the end of the campaign so I decided to just make something for the luls.
What I make is basically the Terminator, but with two (read TWO) underslung LMG's on his arms and a plasma cannon (predator style) and enough actions to use all three every round of combat.

Now the Robot class in Mutant is basically your Undead equivalent, they just WILL NOT stay down.
When they've taken their enitre HP pool of damage they take a -25% to all skils and when they've accumulated 2x their HP in damage they go to -50% and so on.

This was my first and last min/maxxed powergamed character.
I completely WRECKED the ending of the campaign, I killed ALL boss monsters in less than five rounds of combat, pretty much singlehandedly and when the DM finally had enough of mhy shit and put me up against an old-tech combat robot that after an intense fight and everyone else in the party taking grievous injuries it is just me and him now.
I have no ammo left and my plasma cannon has been put out of commission, now he blasts me with energy grenades and does 3x my total HP.
the DM counts me out (since if you take heavier penalties than you have skills you can take no actions) and returns his attention to my wounded comrades. Now the look of the DM's face when I say "I roll to sneak" was priceless. I manage my sneak check, just barely and get up behind this gigantic warmachine. Now if his face was priceless before, then the look on his face when I say "I sabotage his grenade storage, how many grenades did he have again?" could only be described as utter nirvana.

Now my character took a hefty amount of damage from this impromptu suicide bombing, but thanks to a modification to the robot class in the players handbook gave you the option to take a secondary system that makes you able to take ridiculous (6x your max HP) and still survive even if you can't move afterwards there is still the option of repairing you.

So there we stood, most of us blasted to shit and having taken enough damage to be out of commission for about six months in game time.
But we won.

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