Page 616 in The Baratie
first Latest
Page 616

first Previous Next Latest
Average Rating: 4
Number of people who have voted: 4

By the same author as Grand Line 3.5
Author Notes:



30th Oct 2014, 12:53 AM


edit delete



31st Oct 2014, 12:27 AM

Starting a holiday off with child abuse, that's the way to go in my books.

Story Time! Tell a story (if you even have one) of a child character getting knocked around, whether by the players or by NPC's.

I actually kind of have an example of this myself, though not in the usual fashion. So you guys know the question I was asking a couple pages ago regarding that gear for a Dragon, right? Well there's a reason for that, specifically that the character I've designed it for is a young dragon. I found an interesting tidbit in the Draconomicon when I was reading up on D&D dragons in that it's perfectly within canon to play younger dragons as childish or immature, because that's exactly what they are: child dragons. Unfortunately my group only has affection for one kind of child: the kind that can't talk. Poor Light has been lambasted as stupid, a failure, and "not acting like a real dragon" just because he doesn't have the thought processes of a fully grown adult, (he also got taken down in one hit by a giant skeleton monster that rolled 2 Nat 20's in one attack roll, totally not his fault but the party doesn't let him live it down) which I find unfortunate but what can you do?

edit delete reply



31st Oct 2014, 8:59 AM

Oh, I have a story about child abuse, alright. MWAHAHAHAHA!

This is the story of six children, on a Halloween like any other. There was Mike, Jane, and Linda, an older brother and his two sisters. Joe was a small, nervous kid from out of town. Louis and David were the oldest and biggest, and they were cousins. They were brought by their parents to a haunted house made out of an old mansion, and the yard behind it. The kids were sent in, excited about the promise of candy. All of them were excited except for Joe, who needed coaxing by the other kids.

They entered, and everything seemed rather dull at first. Spooky noises, dimly lit rooms, and vaguely creepy atmosphere. It was nothing they hadn't seen before. Then they found a door with a metal bar across it and a sign saying 'DO NOT ENTER'. Mike laughed and said, "Don't be babies. I'll bet you this is where they're playing the lame sound effects." The others urged him not to, but he slid the bar aside, and opened the door.

There, behind the door, was a monster. It was as big as a horse, and it had a wolf's head and body, with a snakelike body down below. It had two massive, rending claws on either side, all at the shoulders. As soon as the door was opened, they heard the snarls and growls. The creature turned its head and looked directly at them, no eyes in its head. The growling stopped, and everything was silent. Then they heard a whisper. "I will eat you."

The beast began to claw its way toward them, and it was bathed in blue fire. They ran for it, toward the exit. They made it to the back door of the old mansion, and shut the door, barely escaping the creature. Through the door windows, they could see the creature watch them for a few unbearably long moments, before turning and wandering off. They breathed a sigh of relief as they walked nervously through the cheesy graveyard tents, with the corny plastic headstones.

After navigating the tents, they found it was a bit like a maze. Then they heard a shout. They looked at the back, and there was a hand reaching out of a grave and grabbing Joe by the ankle. It yanked his foot out from under him, and began to drag him into the dirt. Joe screamed for them to help him, but by the time they had recovered their wits, the earthy grave had swallowed him up. An arm reached out of another grave, and they bolted for it, reaching the end as fast as they could in abject terror.

Their parents were waiting there for them. Raxon, who was running the haunted house, gave each child a whole bag of candy. They noticed Joe's mom wasn't there. Louis spoke up "Where is Joe's mom?" Raxon cocked his head, puzzled. "Who? I don't know anyone named Joe." "The boy that went in with us!" He smiled, and calmly said, "Nonsense, it was only you five to enter. Run along now."

As they left, they saw Joe with another group of kids, getting ready to enter the haunted house.

edit delete reply


31st Oct 2014, 11:50 AM
"In the words of Muldoon..."

Clever girl.

I didn't actually see that one coming.

edit delete reply



31st Oct 2014, 1:04 PM

Raxon was told to give the kids a good scare. He scared them to the best of his abilities without expending excessive resources. The monster chased them, always making sure to be half a step behind them. Joe was a plant, one of Raxon's drones.

You just know that the next day at school, every last one of those kids is gonna be bragging at school about how awesome the haunted house was, but, of course, they weren't scared at all, cause they're brave.

edit delete reply


31st Oct 2014, 11:47 AM

Honestly...that sound like the buildup for a future endgame boss. Basically it all stacks up over time before he finally snaps starts screaming at them about how it's not his fault that these mortal adults who should know better are dragging around a child and then blaming him for being young, immature and less skilled than an adult dragon, lighting their gear on fire and turning sides to study under the nearest evildoer in a misguided but justified bid for revenge. least that's how I'd take things. Hey if your other partymembers can't appreciate a member who's doing their best it'll usually come around and bite them in the ass one way or another. usually at a critical moment. I personally have rorshach'd a few members of my gaming group simply because it would be in character for them to not save the character that has been tormenting them for x number of weeks on the road.

edit delete reply


31st Oct 2014, 4:23 PM

Unfortunately the session we're playing has our party consist of a bunch of dickbag murder monkeys that are only looking out for #1, and are willing to double, triple, and xtuple-cross pretty much anyone and everyone we come across to avoid coming in full confrontation of anyone that could wipe us off the map. As for the players themselves, there's not much they take as canon in the rules, but the "standards" of any given species is certainly one that they take the most seriously. Maybe it's just me being influenced too much by the exceptions rather than the rules but compared to them I create far more, I guess I should say "progressive" and welcoming NPCs compared to them. I'm not really one for encouraging my characters to continue with the whole "prejudice" thing against other species as much as they are, I guess I'm saying. Especially towards dragons. I mean, all those half dragons had to come from somewhere, y'know what I mean?

It's also a session wherein anyone in the party can DM for a session, so I don't have full control during the entirety of the game. Still, the help you guys gave me a couple pages ago is definitely going to come in handy as Light is most certainly going to be needing that powerup soon once he learns that my bard character is about to be executed. (a corrupt church used him as a pawn against the king, and for his accidental crimes he's about to be executed by said king)

edit delete reply


31st Oct 2014, 4:28 PM

To put in perspective what kind of players I'm dealing with, the guy who DMs most of the stuff for the city (like the Corrupt Church and the King plotlines) flat out told me that if the party wanted to they could totally break me out of jail before I get executed. What do they actually do? Tell me that they'll be there to watch when my head gets squished like a grape by the king's warhammer.

edit delete reply


31st Oct 2014, 2:45 PM
"Lady Johanna, plaything of cruel goods, and disciple of madmen. "

I belive i have already told you the tale of Lady Johanna.

For her 12 birtday, she was captured by demonvorshipers and taken to the demons lair. Then she was captured by mountain bandits, befor the dragonlish burnt her city to the ground. During her escape to the capitol her carrawan was harrased by The elves most powerfull hero, even though the elven citys had sent food to help their travels. After that, she was captured by the elven heroes family, a bounch of wratihs, where we saw her get flung from the highest tower with a rope around her neck, only to be found alive, on an altar far underground, in an magical sleep next to her father, about to, once again, be sacreficed.

And the capital had a nasty case of undead/demon infistation when she arived.

After this my dwarf desided that the gods and devils had plans for her, and with the help of his party made her the mother of all mary sues, becouse she should atleast be able to put up a fight against her unfair fate.

edit delete reply



31st Oct 2014, 9:13 PM
"Revenge is a Dish Best Discarded Like the Trash it is"

Ooh, I actually have a story about this, and it's a long one! It started off innocently enough: I wanted to make a cheesy Team Rocket-esque type character, a villain in name but actually a nice guy at heart. What I ended up with was quite a bit more horrifically tragic.

This was for a Pony Tales campaign, so I decided to play as a baby dragon. Shiny Claw (AKA "Dr. Claw") was the son of the dragon lord Fasligand the Mighty, the tyranical ruler of a vast domain of many pony villages from atop his mountain roost.

Shiny's backstory begins right as he's hatching. He's a rather scrawny runt of a dragon, so what does daddy do? To quote from Shiny's backstory...

Lord Fasligand carried his son back out to the ledge. He held the young drake up so he could see.

“Do you see all this? This is all the land I rule. With my might and strength have I brought it into submission. This is what it means to be a dragon. This is your inheritance. This is my gift to you.”

With that Fasligand let go of Shiny Claw, sending him plummeting down the mountain. His mother screeched in alarm and tried to dive after him, but a smack from Fasligand’s tail sent her crashing back into the cavern. The sound of the hatchling bouncing and rolling off the face of the mountain below echoed back to the ledge. A cruel smile spread over Lord Fasligand the Terrible’s face. He had plenty of sons. There was no room for the weak and sickly in his brood.

But wait, there's more!

So Shiny Claw is found (alive, but badly injured) at the bottom of the mountain by a unicorn that adopts him. She raises him as her own child, and defends him from the other villagers that are afraid of him because he's a dragon (what with the evil dragon lord and all).

On Shiny's fourth birthday, his [pony] mom gets him a delicious gemstone, the local orphanage where his mom volunteers throws him a surprise party, and then he gets a kitten. He names her Whiskers. And then daddy shows up and burns the town to the ground, Shiny's mom whispering words of comfort into his ears and holding him tight as she burns to ash.

Shiny, being a dragon and therefore virtually immune to fire, survives, and etches the names of every townspony onto a boulder left in the middle of the former town to serve as an impromptu gravestone, using nothing but his claws until his hands start to bleed. And then he leaves, swearing to show his father what true villainy looks like. And thus he became criminal mastermind and social manipulator, using kindness to earn loyalty and set up a network of contacts.

That's all that's relevant to the topic about his backstory, but I'd be remiss if I didn't mention what eventually happened to Lord Fasligand in-game.

So, the first time daddy shows up, he decides to distact the rest of the party by bringing two buddies along (which we dealt with rather quickly using a rod of wonder), and proceeds to rip the wings off of one of the pegasus PCs. The player had worked this out in advance with the DM, and originally intended to lose both wings, but thanks to some freaking out and quick thinking and acting on the part of the other players, we managed to rescue him after only losing one wing.

The next and last time Fasligand showed up, we were supposed to actually fight him. Now, Shiny had lusted for revenge at one point, but eventually came to realize that revenge was hollow, and that acknowledging his father by seeking revenge played right into his father's philosophy of Might Makes Right.

So what he did instead is deliver a Reason You Suck speech, call him out for precisely what he was, just another encounter on the way to the REAL villain (which was actually true in context, as there was another boss after him, in addition to the Big Bad), then Shiny pointed a rod of wonder at Fasligand and... turned him into a pretzel.

Fasligand, tied up into a knot and unable to move, not to mention thoroughly humiliated, was forced to admit defeat without a fight, and gave Shiny his treasure hoard. The party then marched right past him while he was still struggling to move. It was the most degrading and humiliating end I could think of for a villain like Fasligand who relies on personal strength and power.

I actually don't know what happened to him afterwards, and honestly Shiny just didn't care. To him, his dad was no longer an archrival, but just another bad guy that needed to be taken down to achieve his goals, and what happened to him afterwards was not his concern.

Come to think of it, I delivered a few different Reason You Suck speeches, even when combat was unavoidable. It's really quite satisfying to undercut a villain's logic and point out how stupid or hypocritical they're being right before you punch their face.

edit delete reply



31st Oct 2014, 9:22 PM

TL;DR, dad threw a hatchling off a mountain, burned down his home and murdered everyone he knew on his birthday, then ripped the wing off of his friend. Son responds by turning dad into a pretzel and ignoring him. Dad admits defeat.

edit delete reply

Disloyal Subject

Disloyal Subject

1st Nov 2014, 1:15 PM
"The Sad Story of Meghaera"

I... Wow. Halloween's a good day for stories, huh? That's some of the best setting-appropriate grimdark I've ever heard from a pony campaign. Kudos to Shiny Claw.

My turn. After participating in a war and test-driving an unbelievably ancient & sacred tank, Ophilia of the Shattered Suns mercenary guild was tired of carrying all her gear, and bought a porter slave to compensate for her own weak arms. The Dark Eldar dealer was professional, but on the way out, the Tau doorman shared the 'selling point' that the child was conditioned to obey with chemical implants that would cause her extreme pain if she didn't.
The kid seemed to be a mute, and would only answer with expressionless nods or shakes of her head when quizzed in a slightly awkward friendly manner by Ophilia, who was getting increasingly uncomfortable. Eventually I grabbed my Book of Imperial Saints and rolled on the character generation tables to pluck the name "Meghaera" out for her, and ever since, Megh's been a valued and doted on member of the party.
But she had another name once.

Once upon a time there was a family, who lived on a hive on a prosperous capital world in the Eastern Fringe. Though low level menials, the parents tried their best to care for their two daughters, one very young, one somewhat older. Every day in the manufactora meant another day survived in the Emperor's most benificent gaze.

Until they arrived.

Thin gaunt shadows in the mockery of the human form descended alongside armored, shielded warsuits of prodigious size and power. The fluid movement of the raiders were augmented by the precision fire of advanced weaponry. They were everywhere, and through merged tactics that would eventually enter the Code of Fire as the Lightning Drive, the combined forces massacred and destroyed everything they could, before calling down an Ion Cannon strike, the commanders on station toasting each other to a job well done.

Only the lucky ones died, for the rest found themselves aboard the waiting assault boats. The patriarch of the family was lucky, his wife and daughters, not so much. Brought aboard inhuman ships and through great shining portals, they were thrust into their new lives.

Things were not so different for them. The House demands work, and work requires slaves at times. Thus did the Mother find herself assembling pulse rifle casings in the Forges, while the two Daughters were given the task of charging pulse packs. It was harder than manufactorum work, but over the years they settled into their new routines. After all, a dead slave is a useless slave. At the end of every work day, they would pray together to the God Emperor, for deliverance, before a fitful few hours of sleep under stolen suns.

Everything would change when the Forges came under inspection. An old Archon, surveying the Forges, barked out orders that the Kabalites and Fire Warriors on station would enact without question. Some slaves would be taken away at times. Rumors would fly - some believed them siphoned of their souls to regenerate the fallen, others spoke of transfer to a great vessel known only as the Studio. All have a modicum of truth. The Archon's gaze fell upon the Family, and with a gesture from the spiked figure, the hand of a guard reached for the older sister.

"NO!" screamed the younger, rushing forward, tears in her eyes.

The Archon bent to his knee. Even then he dwarfed the tiny child.
"What did you say?" he whispered calmly.
"Don't take my sister!" the young girl cried. The mother tried to grab her child, but the Incubi on station held her back.
"It is my right, little one," the Archon stated plainly, "She is a resource, to be reallocated as necessary."
Only the signal from the Archon prevented his bodyguard from falling upon the upstart slave.
"She's a person!" the girl yelled, "You can't take her."
The Archon stared a moment, and tenderly took her hand.
"Come with me," he said.

The Archon led the girl to a small dark room. He took a seat, and instructed her to do the same. Petrified, the girl complied. Through a window, which clearly became evident as a one-sided mirror, the Archon gestured at the two beings within. On the left, the Mother, sitting in an uncomfortable chair. On the right, the older sister, chained to a pillar, blindfolded, a gnarled Haemonculus at her side.

"Let them go!" the young girl demanded, tiny fists balled up.
"Little one, you must learn your place," The Archon said, before speaking into a strange microbead, "Let the test begin."

The Haemonculus nodded, and injected the older sister with a great shining needle. The Archon continued, this time to the anxious looking Mother.

"Your elder daughter has the grace of being the first subject to test out our new Tyrant Virus. We have great expectations for the Tyrant-class Wrack, though I do not expect her to survive. Perhaps you will show the virtues that your younger daughter lacks. Say even a single word, and your younger daughter will follow. Say nothing, and she will be returned to you without harm."

The haemonculus floated out of the room.

" Mom, are you there?" the elder daughter cried out, "Mom, please!"
The woman stayed at her seat. The elder daughter's muscles began to twitch.
" hurts!" she moaned, "I'm scared..."
The girl's arm began to split and rupture, ossified organic blades growing from the gashes.
The mother breathed heavily, but she dare not say a word. The elder sister's form began growing, new muscle overtaking old.
"I...can't..." she groaned, "Please...say you're...there..."
Tears streaming down her eyes, banging on the glass, the younger sister stared at the Archon. The barest hint of a smile was on his face.
"Why..." the elder sister gurgled, her clawed form no longer something that could be called human. Her now oversized heart burst out of her chest, leaking vital fluids onto the ground. Finally, her expiration came with a shudder and a mewling.

"What a shame. I will alert the fleshcrafters to the heart problem. The engineers should have a solution within the next standard month."
The younger daughter stood there. She tried to say something, but words escaped her. Only air left her open mouth. Kabalites grabbed the Mother and escorted her out, before the Haemonculi examined the mutated corpse.

"Silence suits you, little one. It is very respectful to be silent for your betters," the Archon said, "It will suit you well when you are sold. You will not need a name, a voice, only your work to give to whoever buys you. Consider this job training, little one. Now, return to your duties."

As was promised, the younger daughter was returned to her mother. But she would't say a word. She would continue to lead her shattered life, alongside her dead-eyed Mother. She would remain silent during the recitation of empty prayers. She would remain silent when the corpse paste was passed around. She would remain silent when her mother was taken away.

She would not speak again for many years.


"What a depressing story. Makes me wonder for your mental sanity."
"It is simply a story. Not all are as privileged as we are."
"Is it true?"
"I have no idea."
"It has to be."
"Why is that?"
"It fits him to a T."
"You know who."
"Maybe I made it all up."
"No, this one is real. I can feel it."
"Then you should also feel your bedtime coming soon. Good night, Saal'ata II."
"Good night, mama."


edit delete reply


1st Nov 2014, 9:08 AM

found the spell i was talking about back then, if you still are looking for one.

It contain how a normal mage can get all the way up to a huge size dragon, so should be easily refitted for your purpose

edit delete reply


2nd Nov 2014, 1:05 AM

Yeah I actually did see that you'd posted that, and I'd taken it into account when making the thing.

Basically what I'm at now is that it will be a large magical necklace, one that will fit a Dragon's neck, and the object is cursed with what is essentially that Form of the Dragon spell you linked to me, with the drawback (it being from a cursed object and all) still being that it will knock him out for the rest of the day. The effect only works on True Dragons and if anyone else attempts to wear the device they temporarily lose a level until it is removed.

Also since it's a CURSED object it's naturally resistant against stuff like Identify, so I can totally lie to my players when I say that it "looks" like a normal magical item of some kind. RAW rules lawyering for the win!

edit delete reply


1st Nov 2014, 10:03 AM
"Exalted Story Time"

I have one about a player character- actually it's a bunch of stories about him. Anyone who's played Exalted knows that it's a universe governed by "Rule of Awesome", and there's a lot of very dark, borderline Lovecraftian, influence in the villains. For example, the Abyssals- empower by sparks of power from the god of the sun that were taken and twisted by the servants of the ghosts of the dead old gods who were once conquered in a Great War.
Yeah, it's that kind of game.
Well, exalted has rules for playing child characters, and boy did I ever- I played an a abyssal named Eulogy of Ungaurded Innocence (Abyssals have to give up their name and take on titles. Responding to your name is a big no-no). In his backstory, he was a normal mortal kid in a town full of more powerful magical beings. His mother was a maid, so he would be sent off to play with the magic kids. Problem was kids are jerks and magic kids are worse, so his 'friends' used to test their new magical powers on him for fun. He didn't have a problem with this, even when a fireball caught him in the back, nearly killed him, and he got dumped in a river. A powerful servant of the dead old ones (The Dowager, if you're in the know) and offered to save him from the brink if death and exalt him. She made it sound fun, and he'd get to 'play' with his friends again. So he said yes.
Problem? Eulogy legitimately didn't know better. He thought that was how friends interact. So after among it two of training, he began his string of grisly murders with those kids.
Eulogy eventually joined the good guys after killing an npc they liked (because Dowager didn't like the bad guy they were fighting), and nearly solo killed one if the most deah villains in the game for them, but got knocked out in the process. At which point, the sworn-to-the-side-of-good lawful paladin characters went "oh good, he killed the villain for us and is unconscious. Well, let's murder him before he wakes up". One character tried to save me, but eventually they caught him and killed the kid who didn't know smh better rather than try and teach him right and wrong.

That kid came back later as Sephiroth and declared war on all living things with an evil doomsday army and almost single handedly killed the other players.

Moral of the story? Probably either try talking to people first if they're PC's or if you kill a kid with evil dead old one powers make damn sure he can't reincarnate into a pissed adult with dead old one powers who knows all your weaknesses

edit delete reply


1st Nov 2014, 10:06 AM

*a month or two of training
*deadly villains
*didnt know any better

Effing auto correct phone

edit delete reply

Neon Vincent

8th Nov 2014, 1:08 AM
"Happy Halloween to you, too!"

I don't have a story, but I do have six drink recipes in video form with women in geeky costumes.

edit delete reply


1st Nov 2017, 8:37 PM

dam it, one of my player had something like that, but it was long ago so i don't remeber it well.
i knew it was something about his grandgfather throwing him out in the woods and

edit delete reply


21st Jul 2018, 2:55 AM

During the D&D campaign I'm playing in we ran afoul of a child pickpocket. We managed to track him down to an orphanage. I thought "excellent", at last a chance to try my diplomacy skills. So I started to talk to the kid to convince him that his behaviour would cause the matron of the orphanage to be upset. I got halfway through my spiel when the party barbarian just decides to threaten the kid with a beating instead.

edit delete reply

Leave a Comment