This is a voluntary opt-in advertisement. Any profit generated goes to Comic Fury for hosting.
Page 870 in Cocoyashi Village
first Latest
Page 870


first Previous Next Latest
Average Rating: 5
Number of people who have voted: 2


By the same author as Grand Line 3.5
Comments:

Luminous Lead




15th Jul 2016, 12:15 AM

Most people think of hands and feet, but pathfinder very usefully mentions the monk's elbows and knees. While natural attacks (such as bites) typically don't mix with a flurry of blows, it makes sense that a resourceful player would find other "hardened points" to use, especially with a quazi-boneless body, .

edit delete reply

Luminous Lead




15th Jul 2016, 12:17 AM

D'oh! I forgot Luffy was a martial artist, not a monk!

edit delete reply

Gap




15th Jul 2016, 12:23 AM

Must resist dick joke. Must resist dick joke.

edit delete reply

XicoFelipe




15th Jul 2016, 8:43 AM

Biting the enemy's dick is severely discouraged.

edit delete reply

BakaGrappler




15th Jul 2016, 1:14 AM
"Tell a Story: You're attacking with what?"

Adventurers love their weapons. They polish them, name them, and sometimes they speak to them, unsettlingly enough. But sometimes adventurers forego their trusty weapons and use something... unique to attack with.

Tell a story about a time a player attacked with something you would not normally associate with combat.

edit delete reply

Raddra




15th Jul 2016, 2:14 AM

I was playing a Lizardfolk fighter-mage in rolemaster and it uses crit charts. I critically hit an orc with my claw attack and the chart rolled 'you tear off your enemies head'. So next round I threw the head at another orc. ANother critical hit. On the 'thrown improvised weapons' chart I rolled 'you crush your enemies skull with your thrown item'.

Yes, rolemaster has a critical chart for -everything-. But its one of my most fond memories of that game.

edit delete reply

Shgon Dunstan




15th Jul 2016, 7:39 PM

... I'm a tad surprised that the G/D/whateverM didn't just read that result as "the thrown skull breaks apart like an overripe melon". :p

edit delete reply

Lionman9

Lionman9




15th Jul 2016, 3:13 AM

During her introductory bar fight, our half-orc bard decided that her rapier was just too...lethal...on the other drunken patrons. This resulted in her picking up someone who had been knocked out on the bar counter and crit-failing his body into one of our other members. Wasn't very successful but still memorable.

edit delete reply

XicoFelipe




15th Jul 2016, 8:45 AM

Petrified goblins on a stick are surprisingly good improvised maces.

edit delete reply

ryuujin

ryuujin




15th Jul 2016, 11:51 AM

They don't need to be petrified my goliath barbarian used a goblin, that I had grappled, as a two handed club to beat another goblin to death.

edit delete reply

MFG




15th Jul 2016, 5:16 PM

My half-orc tried to do this once, but the combination of the -4 penalty for an improvised weapon and my traitorous dice made it impractical.

edit delete reply

TempestK




15th Jul 2016, 10:00 AM
"Have you ever been so angry...?"

So, this was 3.5, and my group is kind of known for being cheese monkeys (thankfully we still enjoy a good RP). One of our group, S'Tarkan, was playing as an anthropomorphic whale Warlock. It was one of the Ravenloft modules, specifically the one where we're reclaiming nodes of power in order to weaken the Vampire lord.

Unfortunately, the Coral Golems ended up being a serious problem due to their magic immunity and their immunity to acid; which rendered his Vitriolic blasts moot.

So, given that his main attack option is out, he goes for a melee attack and attempts to grapple the golem. He crits. There's a pause, and then he says, dead serious "could someone check the weight of one of these things?"

I tell him the weight, and he goes "oh, good. I roll to use the coral golem as a melee weapon." He crits again.

So we watch as the golem we'd been plinking away at is bodily picked up by our Warlock, and used to beat its twin to death, shattering his own weapon as well.

edit delete reply

Mysterious Commenter D




18th Jul 2016, 10:07 PM

Was that THE S'Tarkan?

edit delete reply

Kaze Koichi




15th Jul 2016, 10:52 AM

Our session was not going well. We had that guy, who we hated to be GM, but he ended up GMing 90% of time because everyone else was not in the mood or too tired to GM themselves.
So GM was preparing for a battle and our dwarf paladin came late to the session. The paladin asked where he was and GM angerly said wherever he wants, just shut up. So the paladin said "I'll be drinking at a bar", and GM just nodded and forget about him. Finally he set the battlefield and we started.
We went a couple of rounds before GM remembered that the paladin is not fighting. He asked where the hell he is. In the bar. So GM said one of NPCs with us had a teleport ring and teleported the paladin on the battlefield. The paladin said ok but he is probably going to do poorly because he doesn't have proficiency with a cup of beer.
"Why would you attack with a cup of beer?" "Because I left my mace in a bar." "WHY?" "I put it down before ordering drinks to not scare other customers."
GM was speachless. Several NPCs that we were protecting ended up dead and GM blamed the paladin for it. Which probably was paladin's plan all along, as he hated them, but couldn't kill them himself without loosing his paladinhood. But since then at the start of each battle we asked our paladin to go and hit them with a beer cup.

edit delete reply

HaruNoHikaru




15th Jul 2016, 11:14 AM

So the party was still either lvl 1 or lvl 2. We were trying to actually get into the goblin dungeon but the doors were guarded, and nobody had any ranged weapons. We didn't feel like moving up to melee combat just yet(I think it was just that there were a ton of goblin guards) so I picked up a rock from the ground and tossed it at one of them. The rock got a critical hit, and the ones after it did a lot of damage too.
So we used to joke whenever we went up against goblins again that a rock would be the better weapon :D

edit delete reply

Anvildude




15th Jul 2016, 5:43 PM

Rocks are entirely valid as weapons. Have been for millions of years. And game-wise, there's at least one prestige class for halflings that focuses on them being really, really good at throwing rocks.

edit delete reply

Joe the Rat




15th Jul 2016, 12:04 PM

I have a solid grounding in Super Hero games, so there are very few things that I *don't* think of as weapons. trash cans, streetlights, streets, other people, money, bridges, broken windows, the east river... planets...

There are only two categories of items: Potential weapons, and things you can't lift.

Far and away, my favorite thing to attack someone with is another someone.

edit delete reply

Sirkman




15th Jul 2016, 1:58 PM
"That's Nasty..."

Seriously, there's low and unscrupulous when it comes to combat, and improvised weapons can get real nasty, but...the East River? That's gotta be against the Geneva Convention or something. Even if your enemies didn't take much damage, the filthy disease and toxic substances would ruin their lives forever. Ewww.

edit delete reply

River Road




15th Jul 2016, 1:52 PM

I'd love to know if someone has ever brought J├Ągermonster into a campaign.
"No weapons, you want to keep it friendly."

http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20080606#.V4kiXzV6mM9

edit delete reply

Z2




15th Jul 2016, 2:09 PM

I had a monk character who basically specialized in using improbable things as bludgeons. Here's a list of some highlights, in order of ridiculosity:

Shovel
Horseshoe
Hat
A Mechanical Wing
The Party Cleric
Her Significant Other
A ferry, with the one liner 'I've got a boat to pick with you'
An Entire Train
Twelve Ghosts
The Concept of Existence

edit delete reply

Snowtwo




17th Jul 2016, 11:13 AM

I once saw a monk suplex themselves. Course, that wasn't in D&D, but still funny as heck.

edit delete reply

Otaku

Otaku




15th Jul 2016, 4:39 PM

Disclaimer: System used was GURPS 3e, not Pathfinder.

Okay, so my weretiger (who was stuck in his tiger form) was investigating some ruins because the GM made it clear there was something in there for my character. Nope, not a way to regain my proper shape-shifting powers. XD

Anyway, turns out three flaming creatures that were totally not Flareon >.> tried to chase me away so managed to grab the loot with my mouth and take off. As they pursued me, I took a chance and... sprayed one. You know, with my scent gland back there. Never looked up to confirm if tigers have them, but housecats do and the GM decided my big kitty did as well.

edit delete reply

Anvildude




15th Jul 2016, 5:41 PM

In my d12 system I'm devising, one of the "Weapon Skills" is for Improvised Weapons- bar stools, fence posts, bowls of fruit... it's meant to signify not so much incredible ability with any specific weapon, so much as an ability to determine how best to use anything as a weapon.

edit delete reply

Thaxan




16th Jul 2016, 2:11 AM
"Use that guy's head"

I played a Dragonborn Barbarian in a 5e Game once, who had a(Mostly) friendly rivalry with the party's tiefling paladin. Not quite an example of combat, but we had to break into an ancient, sealed tomb. After searching for an entrance for a while and finding nothing, my barbarian suggested we try to force our way in through a wall. The Paladin scoffed and said "Use your head."
My barbarian grabbed him by the horns and slammed him head first into the tomb like a human battering ram, all the while screaming "USE YOUR HEAD!"
He lost a horn that day. It stayed in my backpack until the day I left that group.

edit delete reply

m2012e




16th Jul 2016, 3:53 PM
"We're all a bunch of doorks"

The Barbarian broke his way out of jail by beating up three guards with the door.

edit delete reply

hiei82




17th Jul 2016, 10:22 AM
"Chemistry was born in the kitchen"

So our group had just finished playing through one Pathfinder AP and decided to start another; specifically the Jade Regent AP. I decided to build an Chirurgeon Alchemist because, well, why the heck not.

I decided to have the character be a pastry chef where all his extracts were baked into his food. Bombs were exploding pies, health restoring Croissants, Bear Claw Mutagens (because they gave bear claws!), the works. It was hell'a fun.

Early on however, I discovered that I couldn't really do much in combat once the exploding pies were gone and the bear claw was used. So I decided to invest in a weapon.

Unfortunately, I was money strapped and we hadn't really found any good weapons to use that I was proficient in. I had a feat at the time so I could have gotten proficiency, but it just didn't seem all that fun.

That's when I looked at my gear list. Turns out Mithral acts as Teflon in Pathfinder. I'd bought some tools made out of it as a lark. One Catch Off Guard feat later and I had the ultimate improvised weapon for any chef; a Non-Stick Mithral Waffle Iron.

Later, I improved it to +1 Flaming to it was self cooking as well as a decent weapon. When the baker eventually died in battle (against undead mammoths), the waffle iron was taken by another character. It was eventually used to defeat the Jade Regent.

The Jade Regent - illegitimate ruler of all Not!Japan - was vanquished by the power of a Waffle Iron. I can only hope Ameiko, upon taking the throne, made it the official weapon of the imperial line.

edit delete reply

Mysterious Frog




15th Jul 2016, 4:11 AM
"Smack Him With his Mount!"

I had a half golem barbarian player in a 3.5 game I was gamemastering who was so strong at level 15 that at one point when they were attacked by several stone giants, they weren't scared at all. One of these giants was riding around on a bulette though. Bulettes are known as landsharks. They're about 25 feet tall and weigh 15 tons. And this thing leaps off a raised platform to land on this barbarian character to begin tearing into them.

After double checking this nasty fellow's carrying capacity, he proceded to lift the bulette off of himself, and then use it as a club to beat all of the stone giants to death with it. I felt sorry for the poor giants...

edit delete reply

Sirkman




15th Jul 2016, 2:01 PM
"Ummm...."

That's an awesome story, but...surely you mean "Half-Goliath", right? If not, could you please explain how someone can be Half-Golem...cause that sounds awesome.

edit delete reply

Otaku

Otaku




15th Jul 2016, 4:42 PM

Dunno about D&D or Pathfinder, but some systems do allow players to be all or partially a golem. It isn't hereditary but a body modification. When GURPS did it, there was a spell (Soul Golem) that allowed the caster to seal himself inside a freshly prepped golem body. Another supplement introduced "Go-limbs", which basically let you create Cyberpunk in a traditional fantasy setting. As well as being a wonderfully horrible pun. XD

edit delete reply

Anvildude




15th Jul 2016, 5:47 PM

Sounds like a Template. Some splatbooks have them, and some end up being silly overpowered, like my similarly strong Ursaur barbarian (centaur, but a polar bear instead of a horse) that was strong enough to go mano-y-draco in a grapplefest with a Colossal Gold Dragon and push a full-grown redwood over bulldozer-style. When you start to measure carrying capacity in Tons...

Also, half-golem has a storied history- Slayers has one, after all.

edit delete reply

Hell Coos




16th Jul 2016, 7:15 AM
"Half Golem"

The Half Golem template is really easy to get, you only need to change one of your limbs by a prostetic limb of X material, each material has it's own benefits, and there is a will save to avoid turning into a construct, buuuut... It's fun. Sadly the bonuses from multiple prostetic arms don't stack (at least the ability bonuses, special abilities from differen materials might)

edit delete reply

Guest




15th Jul 2016, 7:34 AM

While tanks are often asociated with combat, it was still kind of weird when in Changeling: The Lost, our giant of an Ogre started using them as clubs.

edit delete reply

rev666




15th Jul 2016, 12:32 PM

One time i was playing an anthropomorphic baboon that was a martial artist. This guy could punch, kick, headbutt, the works.

Anyway we were trying to sneak into this rich merchants mansion to get the mcguffin of the current adventure but to do so we needed to climb a high wall with spikes. Naturally i go over first to scope the place out when 3 guard dogs with spiked collars appear and charge at me. The GM informs me that any unarmed attack of mine that miss will cause me to take damage from the collar so i decide to run and hide in a nearby shed. In said shed were a couple of hedge trimmers and shovels/spades. I therefore pick up a shovel/spade, walk out and lay out all 3 in 4 rounds. After the dogs were dropped i promptly informed the GM that he should always remember to have his guarddogs spade (in a terrible pun) or neutered after that.

Needless to say that shovel/spade became my primary weapon and i got so many fun uses out of it.

edit delete reply

TempestK




16th Jul 2016, 10:54 AM

You are Shovel Knight.

edit delete reply

steeveee




16th Jul 2016, 12:59 AM

"the guard has now grappled and pinned you against the wall. You cannt use your arms."

"I throw up on him!"

"What?"

"Well im drunk, right? and since I don't normally drink that much... it would make me sick, right?"

"o...k... aaand..."

"And I puke on his shoes!"

<rolls>

"Dammit.>

edit delete reply

Leave a Comment