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Page 516 in The Baratie
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Average Rating: 5
Number of people who have voted: 1


By the same author as Grand Line 3.5
Comments:

Tokoz




12th Mar 2014, 12:41 AM

Priorities. Zoro has them. Tell a story about the players doing stupid things to get a higher possible reward!

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Silenc




12th Mar 2014, 3:22 AM
"Easy answer"

Every damn adventure...

It's not always easy to come up with rules to accomodate the strange stuff they are doing.

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Kaleopolitus




13th Mar 2014, 11:34 AM

"Guys, if we let this guy get away (big bad, first introduction, way OP), then we'll not get any xp from him!"

I just let them. It was funny to toy with them like that. My players aren't very bright.

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Disloyal Subject




20th Mar 2014, 5:08 AM
"Never Tell Me The Odds"

I'm seldom meta enough to stupid things for XP. Material loot, on the other hand... once I decide something is mine, I'm likely go to frightening ends to retrieve it if it is out of my possession. That's only amplified in most of my characters.
As far as stupid things, one of my PCs in a game I ran was favored of the dice enough to pull off sneaking past the optional vampire boss, taking the overleveled loot that was supposed to be compensation for beating a monster they were meant to back down from, and sneak back. Next time, the boss will have more points in Spot. He could've one-shotted the cheeky elf if he'd seen 'em!

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Zero Jack




12th Mar 2014, 1:00 AM

Corey's question is actually a valid one. Should you get XP for defeating a healthy enemy, or would it be the same either way?

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Raxon

Raxon




12th Mar 2014, 1:10 AM

Do I get the same xp whether I kill a hundred orcs in combat, or lock them in a dungeon and flood it?

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Fire Hazard




12th Mar 2014, 1:54 AM

I'd give you MORE experience for finding alternatives to straight combat.

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Raxon

Raxon




12th Mar 2014, 2:51 AM

You realize I will eventually just have my cleric infect himself with what is essentially an ebola std, then have sex with all the orc ladies, and give all the males free aphrodisiacs, right? Cure disease is a cleris spell, and not a high level one, either.

Then of course, I could have my bard cast illusions to make the orcs think their babies are tainted somehow. Then I will tell them about a wellspring that can make them better. Said spring is actually a three hundred meter drop into a whirlpool, kept going by the rotating, grinding gears at the bottom. It just looks like a pool of water, due to the cellophane I put over it.

For my next trick, I will kill an elder dragon with a level ten wizard with only a dagger and a bit of gold. First, I enchant the cave entrance with a bag of holding spell. Then I tie the dagger to a stick, reach it through the entrance, and poke a hole in the ground. This destroys the enchantment and everything inside, dragon included.

Why yes, I do, in fact, have some incredibly evil characters ready to be used.

That said, I think death by orgy is probably not the most horrible way to go. At least not until the hemorrhagic fever takes hold, and the blood begins to flow from everywhere. Then it becomes the most horrible orcish orgy to ever not involve belt sanders.

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Askold




12th Mar 2014, 8:06 AM

First of all, you assume that your cleric has the charisma to be able to bed the orc ladies. (Also, that the cleric has the skill and stamina to keep them interested AND is able to escape from the orc ladies afterwards)

Second, you assume that the cleric won't get killed by angry orc husbands.

Third, you have doomed the local races and the victims of the orc attacks as well as the orcs. You see, if the Magical-super-AIDS works slowly then these orcs will have time to attack the local settlements and pillage/burn/RAPE them. What? You gave the orcs aphrodisiacs and DON'T think that they will go on a rampage? If on the other hand the disease kills the victim extremely fast then the orcs have time to notice that something is wrong and will not fall for the death orgy trick.

The illusion death trap is also only likely to work very few times. And only if the orc camp does not have a shaman (Who would have some dispel or true seeing spell.)

The bag of holding trick may work but I have always hated abusing that ("let's just put a bag of holding in location X and then try to teleport it when the victim comes near!") and other such tricks because if you start doing that then there is nothing stopping EVERYONE including the NPCs from doing that and the whole world will break.

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Zero Jack




12th Mar 2014, 8:55 AM
"Applause"

Ladies and gentlemen, let's give Askold a big round of applause for spotting the flaws in Raxon's crazy plan! Raxon's been posting on Comicfury for a while, and doing the RPG thing for longer, but I think Askold might prove a challenge! Will Raxon emerge victorious? Does Askold even care? Will...
I...I'm sorry, I-I don't what happened. It's like my sense of theatre had a death grip on my brain.

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xuincherguixe

xuincherguixe




12th Mar 2014, 2:14 PM
"What the hell kind of Orc Orgy"

DOESN'T involve belt sanders?

The only time you'd be able to get away with that is if it was set in a time before their use was common practice, but that's pretty archaic isn't it?

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HappyMuffin




12th Mar 2014, 11:26 AM

I think there's something about this in the mister welch list. Though you arn't stampeeding sheep or destroying a space ship so it might still work

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Raxon

Raxon




12th Mar 2014, 2:41 PM

Well, clearly, I would need to replace the cellophane after each orc.

And I would not say I've done a lot of gaming. I have participated in a few groups, but nothing any time recently. Mostly, I'm a writer and fairly creative.

Would I be penalized xp if I let innocents die with the orcs? I was thinking I could taunt the orcs into attaching a fort, betraying the fort by opening the gates, then once all of the orcs are inside, I destroy the drawbridge and burn the whole thing.

Also, if my cleric is evil, what would he care about the orc womens permission? They'll be dead in three days, anyway. Plenty of time to whip all the orcs into a sex frenzy and wipe them out. In addition, ebola is a quirky little disease. It's very rarely encountered for a reason. After the third or fourth itteration, the mortality rate drops precipitously. This is due to the virus being unable to mutate and spread very well. You would require direct contact with bodily fluids to contract it. Highly lethal, but mostly a localized thing. Even if the orcs rampage through a city, there won't be more than a fifty to seventy percent death rate from those directly infected, and the people infected by that have something like a thirty to forty percent death rate, and the number keeps going down.

Also, there is this thing called a cancer mage, which is perfectly designed for such evil work. A few levels of that, and I'm pretty sure I could handle standard ebola. While the orcs are out raiding, the mage kills the couple guards, beds all the women, and forces each one to drink a potion that is both an aphrodisiac and a pheromone catalyst. When the orc men get home, the women will be all over them, swapping around, and creating an orgy. I wonder if he should intercept the orcs on their way back, and give them a bunch of meth laced with ecstasy. When I say evil, I mean evil.

Then again, I do see where you're coming from on the stamina thing. Mages are not known for their physical prowess. At the same time, orgy. I don't think I need to bed all the women. I mean, there could be a few hundred. Naw, I only need to make them drink my potions and infect as many as I can. Even if I do have to get the women's permission first, I'm pretty sure jewelry is dirt cheap for an adventurer. Gold rings, diamond necklaces, they're plentiful. Quite the nice treats for the women of an orc raiding village, though. It's only enchanted stuff that gets pricy.

In theory, it could work, and I would only need to be a hideously evil monster to do it, with no regard for the lives of innocent victims.

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Halosty




12th Mar 2014, 3:53 PM

Immovable Rods are surprisingly movable.

8000 lbs or a mere dc 30 str check (Sure, that requires a raging orc with base 18 str and bull's strength cast on him, but it's not that hard)

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Raxon

Raxon




13th Mar 2014, 1:18 AM

Actually, it takes a very high level wizard, because he'll have to make a greater epic immovable rod. It must be made out of something insanely heavy(neutronium golems exist, thus neutronium is technically available.) It will require a weight capacity of give or take 2 sextillion tons. On top of all of this, you set it to be immovable from the sun as a point of reference, rather than the planet. Then you put a remote speaking rune on it, and modify it to activate on command, rather than at the touch of a button. Cast ghost form on the rod and drop it. Let it fall for about a minute. Dispel ghost sound and activate the rod at the same time. Rod becomes lodged in the planet's tectonic plate. Rod is immovable. Rod rips the plate off as the planet just moves on without it. Earthquakes kill everything else, in addition to the fact the planet is going to collide with a chunk of rock some five thousand miles long one year later.

I call it Ragnarod. Yes, I am aware of all the physics absurdities, but this is a world where a man can doom the world by poking holes in reality and letting a dimension of crazy in. I think Ragnarod is sufficiently insane, difficult, and expensive to say it would work, if you had a wizard powerful enough.

So, probably level 21, maybe 30, if the DM is very stingy.

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Mirage_GSM




13th Mar 2014, 2:36 AM
"Won't work."

Gameplay reason:
- Ghostform's range is "personal". You can't cast it on objects.
- You "cannot pass entirely through an object whose space is larger than your own" with ghostform.
- You can't choose to set the point of reference.

Physical reasons:
- Not sure why you'd want to use neutronium, but it would be impossible to fashion a rod out of it.
- That small a rod wouldn't cause any earthquakes of note even if the spell worked. Tectonic plates aren't indestructible. At worst it would punch a small hole in one.
- Even if everything worked and the rod were really immovable, it is not indestructible. It would either melt in the earth's core or burn up in the atmosphere (both on leaving and on reentering one year later) - provided the earth even passes through the exact same location the next year - orbits aren't really that exact...

Summary: If you want to destroy the world, a simple "Wish" is probably giving you a better chance.

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Ilmaros




13th Mar 2014, 7:22 PM

In the good old times, when a force wall was really an indestructible, unmovable force (disintegrate and sipel magic aside) tearing a planet asunder was much easier...

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Raxon

Raxon




13th Mar 2014, 10:57 PM

Hey! What have I said about being logical at the gaming table. Now you go sit in the silly corner and think about what you've done!

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Raxon

Raxon




12th Mar 2014, 2:44 PM

I do have a plan to destroy the world that involves ripping the planet asunder with an immovable rod.

You know, just in case I die. It's more extreme and less overdone than summoning hastur.

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Anvildude




12th Mar 2014, 6:50 PM

My favorite idea for an enchanted weapon involves Immovable Rods.

It would be a Bow or Crossbow (dwarven crossbow would be nicely thematic) where the crossbow is enchanted to bestow upon the arrows the "Immovable Rod" enchantment, activated on strike.

Perfect weapon to keep the enemy over there while I shoot them more- and possibly causing extra damage if they attempt to rip themselves free.

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LordSmylee

LordSmylee




13th Mar 2014, 1:10 PM

that's an easy one it is Levitate a lvl2 spell for all casters



https://sites.google.com/site/pathfinderogc/magic-items/rods/immovable-rod

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Malroth




12th Mar 2014, 6:57 PM

Earliest legitimate Cancer mage entry i've seen is lv 7, Your common Orc is CR1/2 you wouldn't get XP for killing the orcs this way not because its not a legitimate Killing them plan but because an orc with no class levels is about as much a threat to you at that level as a solitary ant.

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Raxon

Raxon




13th Mar 2014, 1:32 AM

Awww, but it was such an excessively horrible and evil idea.

Strange, for some reason, I remember orcs being a threat up to almost level ten. And after that, dealing with orcs with class levels, mounted orcs, etc. Maybe I've just been away too long.

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Malroth




13th Mar 2014, 7:16 AM

Sure an orc Wizard 10 is just as dangerous as a Human Wizard 10 and worth the same XP but instead of "big green stupid thing trying to smash you" you're fighting an invisible wizard polymorphed to a Hydra while you're trapped in a wall of force taking continous CON damage from a cloudkill just like every other vs lv 10 wizard battle would be orc or not

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Raxon

Raxon




13th Mar 2014, 10:54 PM

Hey, you try taking on a half dozen orc rangers, thieves and barbarians ambushing you in a creepy forest. See how well that goes.

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Raxon

Raxon




12th Mar 2014, 2:31 AM

Looks like cap'n Bikke has been feeding his crew cheetos again.

Incidentally, would anyone like to purchase my services? I am a highly trained nutrinalist.

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Innisa




12th Mar 2014, 9:30 AM

Ugh, in one of the campaigns i'm in presently, we don't really get XP anymore. We level up by completing various quests... which seeing as how the last one we "completed" consisted of us trying to burn down a marble mansion, finding a diary and stealing it, fighting HUGE hell hounds (nimerian?), and getting trapped in a room with gas that made the party lose nearly all points in wisdom... I guess we earned it.
Has anyone else ever played a game like this?

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Ilmaros




12th Mar 2014, 10:00 AM

Well, we mostly play games like that. In fact, i was very surprised when recently we started using XP points again in an introductory campaign for some new players. One would expect our GM to know better, though for the time being the players are beheaving fairly well in regards of the indiscriminate killing for a chaotic neutral power-hungry group such as this... Still, things are bound to escalate soon in one way or another now that the party's stupidity factor, embodied in my character and a friend's, who were twin barbarian orcs with a really serious lack of brain (to the point that they were convinced by a cleric that they weren't orc but gnomes, only bigger), is gone for good thanks to our untimely demise (barbarian rage+rope bridge over a 200' abyss+scared enemies with knives on the other side=bad idea). To make things funnier, our GM allowed me again to be a spellcaster (though i had to promise not to go around using meteor swarm at level 3), and my friend (an another friend who also died the same way... mainly because we grabbed him and his wolf companion to 'help' them cross the bridge) decided to play wizards too, so for now we're planning to do whatever we can in the funnier way possible... like traveling at high speed using the magic disk spell, use shadow anchor to break falls or, at higher levels, create a horde of animated bear traps and have them in a bag of holding 'just in case'

(BTW, any other idea along this line is always welcome)

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Raxon

Raxon




13th Mar 2014, 10:59 PM

"I turned my bag of holding inside out, pulled it over me, and walked through the dungeon walls."

A quote from someone, I forget who. You are playing a game where you can destroy the world by poking a hole in the fabric of reality and letting the crazy in. Logic is a lesser priority here.

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GreatWyrmGold




15th Nov 2014, 10:17 PM

You get a lot of milage out of that screenshot of Nami(?) smiling and leaning on her hand.

(I don't really One Piece.)

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Lilly




29th Nov 2015, 7:02 PM
"Rogue Trader (Again)"

So, we were on this Archotech ship, getting some awesome loot, when a World Eater Astartes appeared. Instead of fleeing like little bitches from the Superhuman Space Marine, we stood, and shot the living shit out of it, and set it on fire.

It did about as much as hitting a lion with a sponge. Luckily, our Psyker passed the test to force him to remove his helmet, then our CQC girl smashed his head in with her Power Mace. Good times.

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