Page 1166 in LogueTown
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Average Rating: 5
Number of people who have voted: 3


By the same author as Grand Line 3.5
Comments:

DeadpanSal




2nd Jul 2018, 12:47 AM

I want to see the Century Soup face now.

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Raxon

Raxon




2nd Jul 2018, 1:34 AM

Aww, you guys got me a shokugeki for my return? You're the best.

Sooo... Did we do a story time about wowing people with cooking? Because I totally have a story for that. Let me tell a little story about Davrel. Davrel is a mage (sorcerer), and a master artificer. He also happened to have paid his way through cooking school by doing a little bounty hunting here and here.

There was a cooking competition being held. Davrel enters because his old classmates were entering, and he wanted to humiliate them. Full course, gourmet meals.

All the way through, Davrel is doing great. Then comes the final round. Davrel presents his platter to each of the judges. The five dishes are as follows: A wedge of lettuce, a plain baked crab, a plate of little rolls of beef, a bowl of plain beans, and an apple. Along with all that, he poured each of them a glass of amber colored sand.

Their immediate reaction was to ask if Davrel was drunk.

He directed them to begin with the lettuce. Their forks sank in. The lettuce was hollowed out and filled with the rest of a salad and a proprietary sauce.

Next came the beans. They took a bite, and realized they weren't beans. Just bean skins containing a tomato bisque.

Next was the thin rolled beef tube things. Turns out they weren't beef. They were paper thin fish, rolled up with nori and other fillings.

Then came the crab. The shell lifted off easily, revealing a buffalo fillet in sauce, with pearl onions on the side. The onions, despite not having any seams to indicate they'd been cut, had the centers replaced with mushroom.

Then came the apple. Tugging on the stem revealed the top to lift off like a lid, revealing a fruit parfait.

Finally, when all of the food had been tasted, he urged them to try a sip of the sand. They did, and in their mouths, it rapidly heated to about body temperature. It was an alchemical mixture. Granular alcohol, but you get it wet, and it heats up, liquefies, and gives off a bit of smoke. This stuff was whiskey.

Davrel won that competition, and won in every way except presentation, which he sacrificed in order to humiliate his asshole former classmates even further.

What do you know? A little magic touch goes a long, long way when you use it with finesse.

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JuicyGrey

JuicyGrey




2nd Jul 2018, 2:08 AM

You little shit eating piece of mongreling horse cock sucking crappy failed abort, welcome back! We missed you!...

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Raxon

Raxon




2nd Jul 2018, 4:32 AM

Long ago, in a distant state, I, Raxon, the pervshifting master of brain bleach, broke up with an unspeakable evil. But, a foolish ex, wielding my own damn kitchen knife, stepped forth to stab me in the literal back. Before the final blow was struck, I stumbled through the front door, and flung her into the legal system.

Now the fool seeks to return to the past, and undo the future that is her cellmate, Large Marge, and a splintery mop handle.

TL;DR Abusive relationships suck, and you should never turn your back on an abuser immediately after breaking up with them.

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Guest




2nd Jul 2018, 2:46 AM

HOLY FUCK YOU'RE ALIVE! Welcome back, Raxon

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Raxon

Raxon




2nd Jul 2018, 4:40 AM

Bad shit went down, lost all my stories and logs, almost died, spent some time in the hospital. Been a rough year or two. But I am free, and I can come back! And then I catch up, and you guys are having a shokugeki in the comic!

This is fantastic.

Also, I see we have buttons for comment coding now. Neat.

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Vanacan




2nd Jul 2018, 6:34 AM

Damn, welcome back you tough bastard. Looks like you live up to your profile picture, at least in toughness.

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Guest




2nd Jul 2018, 8:05 PM

Well, we're glad to have you back, you magnificent bastard

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RandomRex6




2nd Jul 2018, 10:24 PM

Glad to see you're okay. The comment sections of campaign comics aren't the same without you.

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Guest




3rd Jul 2018, 6:30 PM

there might be one or two new comics that started in the meantime, too.

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 9:35 PM

I saw a DS9 campaign comic. Got hyped. It died four years ago.

Sadness.

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Rudedog




4th Jul 2018, 2:07 AM

Welcome back, you dried out gas station egg sandwich! We've missed you!

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8komma2




2nd Jul 2018, 4:20 AM

HE HAS RETURNED TO US!

But yes, victory with a side of humiliated assholes is a good dish.
Best served when cold.

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Vanacan




2nd Jul 2018, 6:39 AM

Never actually got to play him (sadly) but I built an umber bloodline shadow conjuration based sorcerer, who’s biggest goal was to get a bunch of goblins to help him run a restaurant. Not sure why goblins, but he also had a familiar through some trickery with feats, and made him an owl with a special archetype for helping craft.
Now, I’m not sure what Paizo had in mind making that archetype, but an owl as a sous chef as we wander the countryside and confuse villagers was probably not it.

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Guest




2nd Jul 2018, 9:26 AM

Well our Lord has made his triumphant return.

I’ve been playing a ninja in pathfinder recently, who when off the clock is basically a Shonen protagonist. Naturally this includes consuming vast quantities of meat whenever able. So I put some skill ranks into Profession: Chef for the purpose of being able to cook all the various monsters I slay. Not Toriko levels of cooking, but I could smoke and salt most meats. Needless to say I’ve been rather sad that everything we’ve been fighting lately is either intelligent or a construct.

Another campaign is a city campaign requiring requiring stealth, subtly, and politicking. So naturally I bring in the blastyist blast Mage I could. The thing is her cooking TASTES great, thanks to the liberal application of prestidigitation. Sure it’s usually burnt so badly that it’d probably be safer to eat the coals used in the cooking, and the kitchen is usually destroyed, but her waifu is a paladin so they have the fort saves to eat her cooking and not die.

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LadySandry




2nd Jul 2018, 9:52 AM

I once played a campaign in Pathfinder where my character was basically Nyanta from Log Horizon, but evil. I ended up opening a restaurant that became so popular that inter-dimensional archmages were started coming to visit. I ended up bringing in enough money for the party to build our own extinct-volcano dungeon.

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NorthernDruid




2nd Jul 2018, 12:21 PM

In our recently ended generic Dungeon Fantasy... IN SPAAAACE campaign; One of our players used the Bartender template (GURPS can have weird things in their supplements sometimes).

We ended up having a lot of brilliant details around cooking in the campaign. Some of the highlights was when we bribed monster-pirate-mercenaries to switch sides because they loved great food (legit form their bestiary entrance). And when we encountered extradimensional squid monsters and had started eating them within 3 seconds.

Cooking with fire-enchanted arrows FTW.

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Poker




2nd Jul 2018, 3:58 PM

Pleased to meet you, Raxxon. i had read many of your...strange stories when i discovered this comics.

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Raxon

Raxon




2nd Jul 2018, 9:58 PM

Hiya. Sadly, all my old stuff is gone, including all my setting, campaign, and character notes. The notebooks filled with ideas, my library, loads on my games, too. All that stuff from my computer? Gone. Lost in the great 'Hey, I redecorated your apartment while you were out' tragedy of four months ago. Sadly, there will be no more stories from before the last year or so.

Everything from this point on will be from new stories/games. Mostly stories, I guess.

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Poker




3rd Jul 2018, 7:43 AM

No doubt the new stories will be just as intringuing and weird. the important is that you're fine.
good thing is, at least all the stories you had already told in comment section of campaign comics are somewhere to be found.

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m2012e




2nd Jul 2018, 8:59 PM

My rogue suggested that we cook the recently slain* minotaur.

*recently slain: having just been struck down by a critical sneak attack by said rogue wielding a blade soaked in poison

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Solokov




2nd Jul 2018, 10:30 PM

YAY ! RAXON STORYTIME! HOW WE HAVE MISSED YOU SO!

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 2:17 AM

Wow. After everything that happened and all the mind fuckery, I'd heen debating whether or not to even post. Figured you guys might not remember me fondly, or at all.

Four months ago, I got a wakeup call that ended a three year relationship. Everything was fine for a while. Then she told me I really needed help with my time management. It seemed harmless enough. Less time writing, less time gaming, more time engaging in 'productive' hobbies, you know? But then I started being pointed away from things I love.

The wakeup call was coming home to see my bookcases, my consoles (both of them) and games, my binders full of notes and things, gone. Just... Gone. Given away, sold, or simply discarded. This was not why she had a key to my apartment. My books, those could be replaced. The games? A little tougher. Not like I had anything new. The games I can do without. But all my stories. My writing projects, my campaign, and character, and setting notes. My computer was gone, replaced by, no doubt, a more expensive brand name model. It was about on par with what I had, but probably cost three times as much. She did not save anything from my computer. She had already sold it. All my creative endeavors were gone. Everything that I actually enjoyed had been excised.

And she called this my reward for doing very well.

Something clicked, and I asked for her copy of my key back. I told her I wanted my binders and computer back, and she explained they were gone. Sold or thrown out. I broke up with her, right then and there. Told her to go away. She went to the kitchen, and came back with a paring knife. She buried that knife to the hilt in my lower back as I was leading her to the door. I fell through the door, and saw a neighbor. Don't remember much else.

Four months later, I'm healthy again. She's serving time for fraudulently selling my stuff and assault with a deadly weapon. At least, she will, if she tries to violate any laws during her two years of probation. Screw suspended sentences.

So. Raxon Dunwich is gone. The world he lived in, gone. All my other characters and stories are gone. I've remade Rax in a modern setting, but he won't ever be the same character, you know? Just a legacy name. So, I've decided, for ease of understanding, he won't be called Raxon when I talk about him here. He's called by his middle name here, Davrel.

My stories I can share are limited now. I don't have as much to draw from as I had. Didn't have much I could do while recovering but write, so there's new stuff for you to enjoy, even if the old stuff is gone. I'm sorry.

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Zilfallion

Zilfallion




3rd Jul 2018, 2:49 AM

We're just glad to have you back man. It doesn't matter if you've lost the stories, enjoyable though they were.

And yikes.

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 3:44 AM

Still plenty of goodies that survived the purge by virtue of being placed here and over at FID. Lots of different stuff, including like ten stories I wrote of Davrel in the DCU that never got finished due to the pain medications messing with my head. And then that one where he ends up in the star trek future. Man, I was on the good shit.

Got some good stuff with new Rax, too. Recruiting a dullahan knight, seducing a drider queen, the founding of Kerplunkistan, multiple international incidents, the mage olympics, his army of bears, the introduction of Nock, going psycho manhunter in a borg cube, a plan to scam Sinestro out of a yellow ring so he can shoot himself in the face...

Oh yeah. I think you guys are gonna love what I have in store. I've got some good stories, a few gut busters, some very nice crazy and fun worldbuilding, too.

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JuicyGrey

JuicyGrey




3rd Jul 2018, 3:49 AM

As long we don't lose you, source of all those stories, we will be fine...

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 3:59 AM

A promise from me to you. When I tell about Nock, I'm linking it here. You're gonna freaking love Nock. That story's most likely to be told over at the legendary pixel crew, though.

Good old fashioned hijinks. Also, less of the unforgivably dickish behaviour, like the bigotry against other types of mages, and giving dragons to China.

Oh, Davrel screws over China, too. Less trading in human lives, and more humiliation on a global scale. Also, international incidents everywhere.

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DragonTrainer

DragonTrainer




4th Jul 2018, 1:03 AM

I concur with Zilfallion. Yikes!

Still, I'm glad you were able to get out of that toxic relationship with your life. I hope you one day find someone who can appreciate you for who you really are.

Have you considered reaching out to your old role-playing group? Not sure how much it'd help, but... might be worth it anyways?

Also, thank you for sharing some of your stories over on The Legendary Pixel Crew. ^_^

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D




3rd Jul 2018, 4:31 AM

Fuck. Glad to hear you got out.

And it's nice to have you back.

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 5:11 AM

Still a little surprised the welcome's been so fond. I guess Stockholm syndrome really works for us.

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ebonysable




3rd Jul 2018, 5:42 AM

You don't know me, Raxon, I've never commented on a campaign comic before, but I'm breaking my lurking to say that you are very definitely remembered fondly. Your posts make the comment sections unmissable, and even people who don't read the comics enjoy your stories! You have been sent virtual hugs from one such fan, which I am passing on to you.

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 5:54 AM

Glad to hear it. I have plenty of new stories to share. Got a preference between modern era, superheroes, or the star trek era?

Oh, I also rewrote one of my more iconic stories, the abduction of the queen, because I frickin loved that story.

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ebonysable




3rd Jul 2018, 8:31 AM

Start with something cool, and move on to something awesome?

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 2:53 PM

As a matter of fact, I do have something cool, and on topic in keeping with the holiday.

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Solokov




3rd Jul 2018, 8:27 AM

M8, that's a hell of a rollercoaster right there. I'm glad you survived it though. A damn shame about the stuff but stuff is ultimately inconsequential and can be replaced, still stings though. Stay safe.

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 5:37 PM

I didn't own any valuable games, or particularly difficult to find books, it's just my creative works I really mourned. In regards to my gaming books, "Oh, you don't play those games anymore. You don't need them. You have a real friend in your life now. You don't need to play pretend anymore." Something to that effect.

She sorted through all my books and threw out the ones she deemed childish. And by sorted, I mean she googled the authors, glanced at the google search summary, and then dumped them if it had science fiction, fantasy, or anything like that. As least she left my Louis L'Amour westerns, detective books, and shakespeare stuff alone. She sorted out my movies, and tossed a bunch of good ones, but left a bunch of my classic movies.

All in all, I'm not really mad about the books and games. I am angry about all my writing and creative works being thrown out, but more than anything, I'm angry about the way she thought about it. "I don't understand why you like this, so you're better off without it."

Family thinks she was only trying to help me, and that I need to give her another chance. Hah, no.

Sorry if I'm venting a little here, but it's done. Won't be any more of this depressing crap after this page.

Except, of course, for the occasional dips into severely cynical, depressing predictions of the future Davrel makes.

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TB Tabby




2nd Jul 2018, 8:20 AM

It could be sillier...they could've gone with Yakitate Japan.

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Reeder




2nd Jul 2018, 1:12 PM

Mister Ajjikko can go pretty damn over the top with the cooking, too.

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Raxon

Raxon




2nd Jul 2018, 1:24 PM

Or Yumeiro Patissiere.

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Snowtwo




3rd Jul 2018, 5:48 PM

This has been bugging me for a bit but...

The highest you can roll is a 20, right? As such the highest DC you can possibly bypass is a 20, right? With extra skills and the like you can get bonuses but in order to bypass a DC40 you'd need to have a minimum of 20 points in the related skill(s). I can accept that these guys aren't level 1 newbies but... how in the heck are they supposed to bypass a DC40 difficulty? Especially with a niche skill like chef stuff? Like, I could understand maybe if it was one of the 'important' skills like persuasion, but chef?

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Raxon

Raxon




3rd Jul 2018, 5:59 PM

Some specialized classes get inherent bonuses to skills, and those inherent bonuses can increase as you level up. It makes sense that each level of iron chef would grant something like a +2 to profession(chef) and also give plenty of skill points to jack it way up.

As a minmaxed support character, she could put all her skill points in one or two cooking related skills and become an amazing chef. When you're built almost purely for one thing, you can make something like this easily.

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